Monday, December 17, 2012

One of my weekend hobbies here in Samarinda is weddings. Weddings are great. I haven't been to an actual ceremony, but its the reception the day after that is the main attraction. Weddings are a huge event, you invite everybody you know and hundreds if not thousands of people show up, sign in, get a small present like a fan or a tissue paper cover*, drop some money off as a gift, greet the bride and groom, pose for a picture, eat some food and then skedaddle for the next wedding. As a wedding guest, you can be in and out the door in ten minutes, five, if you're in a hurry.

However, for my sixth wedding here, I was not just a wedding guest, I was part of it! Yesterday was the wedding of the daughter of one of my Ibus at school. She invited me to come be a part of the wedding party as one of the official hand shaker people who greets guests as they come in the door. The job of the hand-shaker person, might not be as important as that of the guest-book guard, the present passer-outer, or the food server, but it was exactly right for me. 

I got to get dressed up in traditional kebaya. The skirt was of a long, patterned red and gold fabric, woven with sparkly golden fibers, and the top part is a lacy and bejeweled tunic top. In the picture below you seem me after getting dressed that morning. Kebaya Barbie is drinking lots of coffee, and obviously (and unsurprisingly) has not been doing much housekeeping this week.


We got to the wedding around 10:00 and took some pictures with the bride and groom before the guests arrived. I also had a chance to eat a quick bowl of chicken soup and some beef curry (not an abnormal breakfast option).

As guests began to show up, we took our places at the entrance of the big reception room. I stood with some of the Ibus who are teachers at my school, and some who I hadn't met before, all of us dressed in the the same outfit, and for the next four or five hours, I touched hands with every single woman that walked into that room, and probably about half the men. Now, this wasn't exactly a handshake, Indonesians don't like the firm grip, American-syle handshake, instead you keep your hands in a prayer-shape and lightly shake them around the other person's hand and then touch your chest, maybe with a little head bow thrown in. I did that a thousand times, and one of the best parts was watching people do a double-take realizing there was a bule in the receiving line.

Bu Nur and me

After a few hours, my feet were hurting and the rest of me was sweating; I took a few breaks, but I think I managed to put up a good show as an official member of the greeting party.  It was a really good experience to feel part of a community. There were lots of smiles, photos, babies, and food, so it had everything a good wedding party needs (except the dance floor and the open bar, but I wasn't expecting that). I had fun meeting new people, practicing my bahasa, and watching all the guests decked out in colorful, sparkling wedding clothes.

When Bu Nur picked me up that morning, I tried to figure out the appropriate way to say congratulations. I tried "Selamat Perkawinan" which would mean basically just be wishing "good wedding," but instead found out it is better to say "Selamat mulai hidup baru" which is more like "congratulations on beginning your new life." I like that. 

These Ibus are helping to serve delicious wedding food, soto ayam (chicken soup) and sate (satay...duh)

Bride, groom, and assorted relatives. Those are some excellently sparkly clothes!

Some of the wedding party ibus with the bride and groom



*Fun Fact. I now own three, dark red, lacy tissue box covers. If I can keep this up, I know what everybody back home will be getting as presents from Indonesia

1 comment:

kate said...

This sounds so fun! And great pictures! I'm glad that you really get to be part of the community here :)